Never Let You Go (Bears In Love Book 1) Page 3

  “It means I want forever with you,” he said darkly, seriously.

  “What?” she squeaked. She had never given a thought about forever so caught up she had been in the now.

  “Let’s have breakfast and talk.”

  Chapter 7

  Waverly put her fork down. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Ryan had explained to her about the whole shifter “mate” situation and she couldn’t imagine it.

  “You want to mark me?” she squeaked. “I mean like a permanent mark on me showing the world that I belong to you?”

  “Yes,” he replied. He seemed so nonchalant about the whole matter. But he had always known this was how his life would turn out. Maybe not specifically with her but with some woman. She never even considered the possibility of marriage, of forever with someone. Women like her didn’t get happily ever afters. It wasn’t in her understanding of the world.

  “I know this is a lot for you to take in,” Ryan began quickly seeing her eyes glaze over with worry and fear. “We don’t have to do anything about it today. I mean you can take some time to think about it.”

  “What if I don’t want you to mark me?” she asked suddenly feeling cornered by all this shifter love.

  Ryan took a deep breath as if to steady him. “You may find another man to be with but I will remain – single for the rest of my life. Shifters mate for life with only one person. You’re my one.”

  “No I can’t be,” she exclaimed pushing away from the table. “I mean why would God or nature or whatever be that cruel to you? I’m not mate material. You deserve someone who can complement your – your beauty not detract from it. I barely know how to cook, to clean, to – to fuck! I’m a virgin for God’s sake. You definitely need someone more experienced than me in everything.”

  Ryan’s heart swelled at the possibility that he would be her only lover. It made him want her even more. He could teach her how to love another being. His bear practically purred at the thought of being the only one to have touched that lush body of hers.

  “I don’t think the Goddess is being cruel to me,” he stated emphatically. “I don’t like you thinking that way either. You are perfection to me.”

  “Is that true?” she questioned him narrowing her eyes at him. “Or is that just nature telling you to mate with me because we have compatible DNA?”

  “The mating bond goes beyond that,” he explained leaning in to show her how serious he was about this. “We are compatible in many ways. Haven’t you felt that? I know humans feel the bond less powerfully than we shifters do but you do feel it a little.”

  “I – I guess. I mean I feel – safe with you. Most men I don’t feel safe with. I’m always waiting for them to say something rude to hurt my feelings. But you aren’t like that.”

  “No I’m not. Because I – feel very deeply for you. And it would kill me to hurt you in anyway.”

  “It would?”

  “Yes sweetness. I hate how shocked you sound. Nobody should be surprised by being respected.”

  “You don’t think I’m fat and ugly?” Waverly asked bluntly. “I don’t think I’m going to be able to change those facts. Can you live with someone like me in your life, in public, with your family? One guy I dated for several months would never take me to see his family or friends. He was – embarrassed by me. Can you keep from being ashamed of me?”

  “I would be proud to have you on my arm,” he insisted forcefully.

  “Until all the comments come,” she said dejectedly.

  “I would beat the shit out of anyone who made some untoward comment about you, my mate.”

  “You would?” she exclaimed surprised.

  “Of course. That’s what boyfriends do. Defend the honor of those they love.”

  “Love?” she squeaked. “You – love me?”

  “Yes Waverly,” he began seriously. “I’ve wanted you since I first saw you at the speed dating event. But the more time I’ve spent with you the more I’ve grown fond of you. I call it love but I know that feels too fast for you.”

  “It does. We haven’t even known each other for more than a day? How could you love me?”

  “The mating bond is instinctual. We know when we have met our mates, like that,” he responded snapping his fingers. “Did you not feel a – pull towards me when we first met?”

  “Yes. But how could any breathing woman not feel a pull towards you,” she said smiling. “You’re gorgeous.”

  He chuckled at her compliment.

  “Thank you,” he said bashfully. “But I mean something more. Like the safety thing. That is the mate bond calling to you. Letting you know I am a good protector. I’m also a good provider. I make a good living. I own my own land. I care about you. I love you and I need you. I know things are moving along quickly but everything you are feeling I feel twice as hard.”

  “So you want me – physically?” she asked dumbfounded by the idea. “How can you … I am so not – your type.”

  “You know my type?” he asked irritated that she was not more accepting of his feelings. “I would have thought that kiss showed you what my type is – you.”

  He smiled at her blush. Christ she was so innocent, he thought.

  “So not only the bear but the man – wants me?” she asked shyly.

  “Most definitely,” he answered without hesitation.

  She began to bit that lower lip in concentration as she thought about what he was saying. Could it be true? This man and his bear wanted her. Needed her it sounded like.

  She definitely wanted him. A curl of arousal wound itself in her belly. But did she love him. She barely knew him.

  “Are you asking for a commitment right now?” she asked tentative about pursuing this line of questioning afraid of the answer.

  “No sweetness,” he replied shaking his head. “I know what I want. I know what my bear wants. But I know it may take you some time to decide on what you want.”

  “I’ve never thought about – forever,” she told him honestly. “I mean a girl like me doesn’t even dare to dream about – forever.”

  “What do you mean a girl like you?” he asked sure he wasn’t going to like the answer.

  “Ugly and fat,” she sighed self-consciously. “I mean if I were one or the other maybe I could harbor some fantasy about finding a man to love me, but when you’re both it makes it hard to think that any man would want you for marriage material.”

  “Why do you date then?” he asked confused.

  She looked away ashamed unable to look him in the eye.

  “Sweetness what did I say wrong?” he asked not liking this look of humiliation covering her face.

  She shook her head erratically. “It’s not you,” she said softly. “I date because even though I know it’s a near impossibility that I’ll find a man willing to overlook my deficits, I still want desperately … to be intimate with someone.” Keeping her head down she looked up at him with only her eyes and he could see the tears in them.

  He got up and walked around the small table in nearly one step. He dropped to his knees and was at eye-to-eye level with her. Grabbing her head he pulled it up so she was looking at him. The tears didn’t fall. He was proud of her self-control.

  “Everyone wants that kind of intimacy,” he told her gently as his thumb tenderly caressed her cheek. His heart broke a little when he saw her nuzzle into his touch like a starving woman. Her eyes closed in sweet rapture for his caress.

  “Baby girl you are so hungry,” he rumbled quietly. “It’s time you were fed.”

  Chapter 8

  She had never been naked in front of a man. His eyes trailed over her body as she undressed. It had been disconcerting having his entire attention on her. Did he like what he saw? She was unable to read his expression.

  Lying back on her bed naked, Waverly was nervous. She gripped the bedspread by her sides balling it in her hands holding on tight. Her breathing was a bit rapid as was her heart. She stared up at Ryan with troubled br
own eyes.

  What was going to happen now?

  “We aren’t going to make love Waverly,” he told her sitting down next to her. “I want to hold you. Close. I want to stroke you and caress you. Will you let me do that?”

  “Everywhere?” she asked her voice breathy.

  “Yes sweetness, everywhere,” he answered his voice a rumble from somewhere deep inside of his chest. It sounded primal and his eyes lit up golden.

  She shivered at the appearance of his animal side. It wasn’t from fear but anticipation. She was about to experience something she had not experienced ever, the intimate touch of a preternatural man. A rush of awareness ran down her spine opening up her consciousness to what was about to happen.

  Her soul settled into her body, fusing with it. People always accused her of living inside her mind and not in her body. There was no way she was about to miss this experience of physical tenderness.

  Ryan settled his big bulk next to her. Even lying down, Waverly felt dainty next to him. There was nothing about her that was small but next to his muscular body, she felt tiny. It was a heady feeling. A little scary too.

  “Turn to me sweetness,” he commanded gently. She did as she was told. “I want you to not touch me ok?”

  “Why can’t I touch you?” she asked upset that he didn’t want her hands on him.

  “Because you’re too much of a distraction to me by being near. If you touched me I think I would lose all control I had and ravish you,” he told her bluntly his hunger for her showing clearly in his face.

  She smiled up at him. “Perhaps I want you to ravish me,” she said coyly.

  “Not today baby girl. But soon.”

  “Ok,” she said pouting slightly.

  He laughed at her insouciance.

  “Don’t worry Waverly. You’ll have enough to occupy yourself with me only touching you.”

  He ran the back of his fingers against her cheek. Her skin was so soft and warm. It was a beautiful caramel color. Her high cheeks and almond shaped eyes pointed to a mixed heritage. She was stunning. He had lucked out with his mate. Now to get her to see that fact.

  Pushing back her hair across her shoulder so that he could have access to her neck, he felt her shudder when he gently gripped her around the throat, his big hand nearly encircling her.

  “Ryan?” she questioned fearfully looking at him.

  “I’m only claiming what’s mine sweetness,” he told her possessively. He squeezed slightly to let her know she was his but not enough to scare her even more. He then slid his palm down her neck and onto her chest.

  She gasped when his hand passed ever so lightly across her nipples. They pebbled hard, almost painfully against his slight caress. Moving from one breast to the other he massaged the overflowing flesh in his hand. The sparkles he raised in her chest left no doubt that there was a man touching her intimately and her body enjoyed his strokes.

  She was all-natural so her tits were soft and supple. He could drink his full from her he thought. Their cubs would never go hungry with Waverly as their mother, Ryan thought satisfyingly. His bear hummed its agreement.

  It felt so wonderful to be caressed she thought distractedly because of the many endorphins and hormones his touch was releasing in her body. It was about to become overwhelming.

  When he reached out for her stomach, she froze. Everything in her went still. Nobody had ever touched her there. It was her most disgusting body part that was on public display. What must he be thinking as he touched all that flesh?

  “Waverly,” he admonished gently. “Don’t go off to some other place. Stay here with me. I’m the one in front of you right now and I can’t keep my hands off of your thick sexy body. I’m not one of those assholes who have hurt you. It’s me Ryan.”

  “You don’t mind – touching me – there?” she asked perplexed. Every man she had met hated her body. She hated it. But Ryan didn’t? She searched his face for any indication of disgust or revulsion. All she saw was need.

  “I don’t mind touching you anywhere but if I have to be precise then no, I don’t mind touching your stomach.”

  “How can you not?” she asked genuinely baffled by his words and actions.

  “Why can’t I? I love the way you feel underneath my hands. You’re soft and fluffy.”

  She smiled at the word.

  “I’ve never thought of myself as ‘fluffy,’ ” she remarked with a chuckle. “I think it – suits me.”

  He returned her smile. “It does,” he agreed. “You have a real body. Nothing fake on you.”

  He felt her relax beneath his touch finally. Running his hands down her stomach onto her hips, he noticed the involuntary opening of her legs to him. She wanted his touch on her most intimate of places. She craved it. Who was he to deny her?

  As he rolled over, he pushed her onto her back. Grabbing one of her thighs, he pulled her legs open giving him space to rest his own hips within hers. She accommodated him perfectly her legs spread wide beneath him.

  His cock began to swell at the feel of her warmth even through his jeans. He held himself up on his elbows so as not to crush her except for the slight pressure he pushed upon her shaved womanhood.

  Watching her respond to his body reacting to hers, he marveled at the wonder in her eyes. Truly no man had ever touched her in the ways he was exploring her. He was her first.

  And last, he thought to himself territorially. No man would ever survey her curves and valleys except him. He would kill any man that tried to. She belonged to him and him alone. His bear was in agreement with him on this point. It growled at the thought of any one else caressing her in such an intimate way.

  “Sweetness you never had sex with another man?” he asked knowing the answer already.

  She shook her head. “No,” she answered timidly. “I guess I’m the oldest virgin in the world,” she tried to joke but he didn’t miss the longing in her voice that didn’t want what she said to be true.

  “It makes me happy that I’ll be your only lover,” he told her honestly. “I’ll be the one to bring you to your first orgasm. That’s pretty intoxicating to my male ego.”

  “It is? So you don’t mind?”

  “No.”

  “How many lovers have you had?” she asked wondering what she was up against.

  “Not many,” he began. “Three.”

  “Really? That’s all?”

  He chuckled. “Would you have wanted me to have more?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. I mean I guess I thought most men slept with lots of women in order to find the right one for them.”

  “Maybe non-shifters,” he conceded. “But I find that in order to sleep with a woman, I need to feel some emotional attachment to her. The three women I slept with I thought I loved. Turned out not to be the case but at the time I thought they were the one for me.”

  “Why did you break up with them?”

  “None of them wanted to be with a shifter.”

  “That’s crazy!” she exclaimed thoroughly outraged for him. “That’s discriminatory. Why does it matter that you’re a shifter? You’re still a wonderful being.”

  “Thank you. But some are still prejudiced against us.”

  “I’m sorry you had to meet three of them.”

  “I realized that I needed to be up front with who I am before getting too invested in a relationship and having the other person break my heart.”

  “They hurt you.”

  “No. Not really. At the time I thought so but now I realize that I wasn’t in love with them. I cared for them deeply but it wasn’t love.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “My bear didn’t have an opinion about them one way or another.”

  “Oh.”

  “That should have been the first sign to me that things weren’t going to work out. But I wanted to be settled and in a relationship so badly I disregarded a part of myself. After the last woman, I decided I couldn’t do that anymore. I needed to take serious
ly my instinctual side and use it to help me find what I need.”

  “So now … your bear – wants me,” she said shyly, looking up at him expectantly.

  She needed his continued reassurance. He would gladly spend the rest of their lives doing so if that was what she needed from him.

  “Most definitely,” he said without hesitation.

  “Can I see – your bear?” she asked tentatively. “Is that ok to ask or am I being rude?”

  “Not at all. I don’t think you could ever be rude to anyone. It’s a perfectly acceptable request. However, I want to finish what I started before I show you my bear.”

  “What you started – Oh!”

  Her neck arched as he rubbed his hard cock against her now weeping pussy. The row of buttons on his jeans dug into her sensitive folds causing her to cry out in passion. The brunt of his attack was on her clit. His erect dick rocked back and forth across it.

  Grabbing a handful of her long black hair, he angled her head so that he could kiss her deeply. She opened to him without hesitation. Thrusting his tongue over the edge of her teeth, he stole her breath away with the grasping kiss. He made love to her mouth, soon his tongue and hips moving in sync with each other, tantalizing her with what he wanted to do to her but didn’t.

  It made her want him more. Maybe that was why he did it. Was he that diabolical?

  As he rocked against her increasingly wet pussy, a tide of pleasure began rising up inside her. She moaned into his mouth, desperate for relief from the tension building in her body. Her hands gripped the pillows on either side of her, trying frantically to keep from touching him.

  “Are you ready to come for me sweetness?” he asked his voice rough with need.

  “Yes,” she mewled, nodding her head erratically. “Please Ryan.”

  With slow deliberate movements, he humped against her hard. His steel hard cock battered her clit through their clothes.